Story about Vincent, Jokaar, and Joe Part I
My name is Tan Joe Yew. A name given by my father on the day I was born. Well, I am not sure if he comes out this name long ago or what, well, that is not the case. Thus I am called as Ah Joe in Chinese. This name, carries a big hope. It was loosely translated as “Ancestor Pride”. I hope I can be one. Later on, those English educated will call me Joe or Joe Yew. Some even call me Joey.
When I was in form 2, I wanted an English name inform of my surname. I came out Steven, so I can call myself Steven Tan. Then the short form for Steven will be Steve. I liked it. But too bad, some Chinese educated people call it steam…rather then Steve. Furthermore, my uncle is also called Steven. So I dropped this name.
During form 3, my friend is taking order on making name tags. I am thinking of putting an English name on it rather than the plain old Tan Joe Yew. This name Vincent came out from my mind. It was from a Final Fantasy character called Vincent Valentine. I try to pronounce it, Vincent Tan…sound nice. So I decided my English name will be Vincent. Still I seldom used it infront of Chinese educated people because they will call it “Wansan” or God of Trouble which is loosely translated. So I will just tell them my name is Joe.
Vincent, this name I have fully utilized it when I went to APIIT. I told all my friends my name is Vincent. Later on, I tried to put my name in this way, Vincent Joe Yew Tan. Then later, Vincent Joe Y. Tan. Then Vincent “Joe” Tan. Joe seems to be my middle name jor. Yew is almost non existent.
In some of my imagination stories, I always associate my name Vincent with this surname MacLeod. I adapt this family name from a movie called Highlander. It was a Scottish name. When I pronounce it, Vincent MacLeod, it sounds good.
Chinese people have the habit to add Ah on most of the name they called. So, I am known as Ah Vincent. The name Joe, seems to be forgotten.
Jokaar, this name, this character, this personality, this fake entity, came out when I was Form 4. It was a fake entity I talk to. This name, maybe adapted from Joker, but indirectly, thus Jokaar. He is friendly, well, not too friendly. Well, who cares, he is me, I am him. Just I am in dominant where he is recessive, that is why you won’t really see him out. It just lived in my mind. A friend which I have no way of destroying it. Well, how can you destroy yourself?
Jokaar will only appeared in my mind when I am depress. This entity will be alive when I am feeling down, sad, disappointment. I talk to him, he responds. Although it is just a mind game in my head, but it responds. It seems it is a mechanism for me to handle depression. When I was ok, this entity just keeps quiet. But sometimes, I will just talk to him out of boredom. So, physically, I can stay alone by myself, but mentally I need someone to interact to…
TO BE CONTINUE…
When I was in form 2, I wanted an English name inform of my surname. I came out Steven, so I can call myself Steven Tan. Then the short form for Steven will be Steve. I liked it. But too bad, some Chinese educated people call it steam…rather then Steve. Furthermore, my uncle is also called Steven. So I dropped this name.
During form 3, my friend is taking order on making name tags. I am thinking of putting an English name on it rather than the plain old Tan Joe Yew. This name Vincent came out from my mind. It was from a Final Fantasy character called Vincent Valentine. I try to pronounce it, Vincent Tan…sound nice. So I decided my English name will be Vincent. Still I seldom used it infront of Chinese educated people because they will call it “Wansan” or God of Trouble which is loosely translated. So I will just tell them my name is Joe.
Vincent, this name I have fully utilized it when I went to APIIT. I told all my friends my name is Vincent. Later on, I tried to put my name in this way, Vincent Joe Yew Tan. Then later, Vincent Joe Y. Tan. Then Vincent “Joe” Tan. Joe seems to be my middle name jor. Yew is almost non existent.
In some of my imagination stories, I always associate my name Vincent with this surname MacLeod. I adapt this family name from a movie called Highlander. It was a Scottish name. When I pronounce it, Vincent MacLeod, it sounds good.
Chinese people have the habit to add Ah on most of the name they called. So, I am known as Ah Vincent. The name Joe, seems to be forgotten.
Jokaar, this name, this character, this personality, this fake entity, came out when I was Form 4. It was a fake entity I talk to. This name, maybe adapted from Joker, but indirectly, thus Jokaar. He is friendly, well, not too friendly. Well, who cares, he is me, I am him. Just I am in dominant where he is recessive, that is why you won’t really see him out. It just lived in my mind. A friend which I have no way of destroying it. Well, how can you destroy yourself?
Jokaar will only appeared in my mind when I am depress. This entity will be alive when I am feeling down, sad, disappointment. I talk to him, he responds. Although it is just a mind game in my head, but it responds. It seems it is a mechanism for me to handle depression. When I was ok, this entity just keeps quiet. But sometimes, I will just talk to him out of boredom. So, physically, I can stay alone by myself, but mentally I need someone to interact to…
TO BE CONTINUE…
posted by Vincent at 2:51 AM
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